I love that you decided to do these posts. I feel like I'm going to learn a lot from you and learn a lot about myself and heal in the process. You're such an amazing, wise and wholesome person Erika. I'm so grateful that you're sharing these stories with us. 🫶
This post about needing others validation feels very timely for me. I know exactly the source of this for myself, and have spent the last three years working on it. The first instance where I realized that I was putting too much stock into getting validation from others was in my graduate thesis class. The professor was the first and only professor who collaborated with me to write my script instead of telling me everything I did was wrong. The second time it happened was when I was in a private coaching session for a burlesque act I was working on. The coach took my ideas and helped me enhance them from a collaborative perspective. I discovered that I was more successful working with someone who wanted me to be myself rather than make me adapt to what they thought was "the right way." I am in the middle of writing a script for a film that I am making later this year and I am working with another writer who I highly respect. They are very precise on what they think is "the right and wrong way" to do EVERYTHING. However, they're a naysayer to be a naysayer (they admitted it after a discussion), and at first I thought I had to explain, justify and compromise with them. Then, it dawned on me. There I am seeking that validation again. Because I want them to see me as an equal and think my writing is good. This story is so important to me that when they immediately shut down my thoughts and ideas, I was scrambled to find the correct way they wanted me to respond, write, and to exist to be honest. While I can’t stop working with them for the time being. I can now figure out what I need to do in order to protect my peace and ensure that this script reflects the story I am trying to tell.
Awe I love this. You definitely have a talent for writing. Seeking validation I think is only human but it is great introspection to recognize it and try to move past it.
100p! I think the key is to let external affirmation be the BONUS result, not the ONLY result we are seeking. I'm about to start a new Broadway show and keep reminding myself that the only person I have to make proud is myself. If I can feel good about the work and that I've put my all into it, that's enough!
I love that you decided to do these posts. I feel like I'm going to learn a lot from you and learn a lot about myself and heal in the process. You're such an amazing, wise and wholesome person Erika. I'm so grateful that you're sharing these stories with us. 🫶
Whoa.
I relate to the part where it says that you forgot to breathe. I also forgot to breathe sometimes
This post about needing others validation feels very timely for me. I know exactly the source of this for myself, and have spent the last three years working on it. The first instance where I realized that I was putting too much stock into getting validation from others was in my graduate thesis class. The professor was the first and only professor who collaborated with me to write my script instead of telling me everything I did was wrong. The second time it happened was when I was in a private coaching session for a burlesque act I was working on. The coach took my ideas and helped me enhance them from a collaborative perspective. I discovered that I was more successful working with someone who wanted me to be myself rather than make me adapt to what they thought was "the right way." I am in the middle of writing a script for a film that I am making later this year and I am working with another writer who I highly respect. They are very precise on what they think is "the right and wrong way" to do EVERYTHING. However, they're a naysayer to be a naysayer (they admitted it after a discussion), and at first I thought I had to explain, justify and compromise with them. Then, it dawned on me. There I am seeking that validation again. Because I want them to see me as an equal and think my writing is good. This story is so important to me that when they immediately shut down my thoughts and ideas, I was scrambled to find the correct way they wanted me to respond, write, and to exist to be honest. While I can’t stop working with them for the time being. I can now figure out what I need to do in order to protect my peace and ensure that this script reflects the story I am trying to tell.
Awe I love this. You definitely have a talent for writing. Seeking validation I think is only human but it is great introspection to recognize it and try to move past it.
100p! I think the key is to let external affirmation be the BONUS result, not the ONLY result we are seeking. I'm about to start a new Broadway show and keep reminding myself that the only person I have to make proud is myself. If I can feel good about the work and that I've put my all into it, that's enough!
For what it's worth, I think you seem to be killing it ❤️
Thank you so much for these stories, Erika. They feel very vulnerable and relatable.